Dear reader,
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| 'Nom nom...' |
I forgot to mention, yesterday I got home and I went to switch on the bathroom light to take a shower. And there were like, so many little black almost microscopic wormy like stuff dangling around the bathroom door and switches o.o That made my phobia of bugs official. One of the little buggers climbed onto my arm and I felt worms all over me for the rest of the day. Earlier, Charis posted this on my wall:
Beautiful you are, when one just believes. Beautiful one is when their name and Beautiful has the first same 3 letters. Beautifully and wonderfully made in God's eyes, beautiful in the eyes of her friends~
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| 'come pain, come hurt...' |
She probably did something like that to all her friends. I think that was really sweet and touched me a little. But I still felt like words weren't enough. I need the someone to tell me. To prove to me. To love me. I was writing my fan fic last night and I realized how I've been mixing my fantasies with life. Thinking about the person I like so much that I imagine that he's my best friend when he doesn't even know I exist. And the worst part is when you tell yourself, it's not real. I literally felt like I was living through my fan fiction. Thus, began the mental fight and lament at night, accompanied by tears.
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| 'till the sun don't shine...' |
I doubt my friends can tell what goes on in my head if I didn't type it out. It's amazing how someone can put on a sincere smile even when they don't mean it. The happiest girl you know could be the one with the scars on her hand and heart. And I try to tell people about my problems, they dismiss it and change the topic. They probably think I'm pathetic and weird anyway. I can just hear them... 'Whats wrong with her?' 'She's so pathetic.' Another thing I'd like to say is, I think photos were meant to be memories and bring smiles. Not make another person jealous. I'd rather be in a picture that people would laugh at than be in a picture that others would be jealous of. I guess that's it for now. Nothing else came to my head. Love me.
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